My mom called from Chicago to say she wanted to visit Montenegro. I was living in France with my husband after our move three years earlier.

The suggestion came as a surprise at first. Since our relocation abroad, she had shown more interest in exploring new places. Yet Montenegro stood out as an unexpected choice that sparked curiosity.

She had seen a video about the country on a Polish-language Facebook page she follows regularly.

I looked forward to another shared trip, particularly one she had picked. Since we were heading that direction anyway, adding more of the area made sense.

As a travel writer and journalist, I appreciated how she wanted to understand my work and enjoy the aspects of travel that excite me.

She had come to France several times, but the Balkans offered a larger step into adventure.

I arranged for my husband and me to join her across Croatia, Montenegro, and Bosnia and Herzegovina for two weeks. The plan involved crossing borders beyond the European Union, managing multiple logistics layers, and building a schedule suited to my mom, who would turn 75 during the journey.

I realized my standard travel speed would not suit this trip, so advance planning was essential

My husband and I prefer energetic trips. We often log 20,000 steps daily, enjoy hikes to scenic spots, and push through tough conditions with the thought that we might not return. We favor public transport whenever possible.

My mom approaches travel in her own way. After 40 years working as a server, she is used to long hours on her feet and stays generally healthy, yet retirement has led to a slower rhythm.

Even on active days, she prefers a steadier pace. Slopes pose extra difficulty, and extended walks on rough ground can tire her quickly.

Before reserving places to stay or transport, I reviewed the physical effort required each day. I examined elevation shifts on routes from hotels to sights, found options to skip needless climbs, and skipped overly long tours.

I also booked private drivers in advance for greater flexibility. This allowed us to adjust stops based on our needs instead of a large group's timetable, including timing, drop-off points, and duration at each location.

We introduced minor changes along the way to keep my mom comfortable

We began with three relaxed nights in Dubrovnik, Croatia. There we wandered the Old Town, enjoyed extended meals of fresh seafood, and spent time in the pool after noticing my mom had more stamina in the water than on land.

Next we traveled into Montenegro and discovered the value of rest. On a warm day in Perast, she enjoyed the brief boat trip to the man-made island of Our Lady of the Rocks.

By midday the heat left everyone short-tempered. Ice cream offered some relief, but the key was adding breaks before anyone felt overwhelmed.

My husband and I normally pause in the late afternoon rather than staying out until dinner. With my mom we simply shifted that break earlier. She did not request special treatment, yet I learned to notice when she needed one.

At times the best solution was allowing us to separate briefly. In Kotor's Old Town, Montenegro, near our base in Dobrota, my husband and I climbed to the fortress while she rested and fed a cat that joined us during our three-day visit.

When we returned she felt refreshed, and we explored together for several hours.

Our route then led to Bosnia and Herzegovina, including a four-hour drive on twisting mountain roads that left everyone queasy, especially my mom. Here the private driver proved worthwhile.

He stopped so she could step out for fresh air and recover, waited patiently without concern over timing, and let her sit in the front seat for the remainder of the ride.

On a large bus she would likely have had to endure the discomfort.

By the trip's end I was impressed by what she could manage

Our group of three operated smoothly by the final stop in Sarajevo, Bosnia and Herzegovina. I had learned what worked and what did not. Steep slopes were avoided. Long drives proved tiring and were limited when possible. She could handle full days when breaks were included.

In Sarajevo we joined several guided tours to explore the city's history and wartime past. My mom had faced her own challenges in Poland before moving to the United States in the 1980s, so I wondered how she would respond to difficult topics. She remained engaged throughout.

During the siege a narrow tunnel known as the Tunnel of Hope was built under the airport to transport supplies and people. Today visitors can walk a restored portion. I expected her to wait outside, yet she walked straight through.

The main lesson from traveling with my mom was that assumptions about her limits were unnecessary. Paying close attention proved more effective.

She did not require an entirely different itinerary. She needed me to recognize that her ideal travel day differed slightly from mine, yet it could still feel complete.