This story is based on an interview with full-time caregiver Deaundra Vega, 52, of Colorado Springs. It has been edited for length and clarity.

I connected with my future husband Jesse online in 2022 and soon realized I already knew some of his relatives. After several dates he explained that he had medically retired from his role as an audiovisual engineer with the Department of Defense.

I questioned whether I could handle a partner with a serious medical issue

Jesse lives with severe epilepsy that triggers dozens of seizures daily. During one of our early outings he experienced a major episode. His brother managed the situation but the event left me unsettled and unsure about continuing the relationship.

After some reflection I asked myself how I would feel if our positions were reversed. I chose to learn everything possible about epilepsy so I could offer the same level of support his brother provided.

Another intense seizure left Jesse with a large bruise on his face. The doctor confirmed he could no longer be left alone and required round-the-clock supervision. Because he is allergic to standard epilepsy medication the challenges were even greater. He needed help even for basic tasks such as showering yet full-time professional care was financially out of reach.

As someone who enjoys helping others I decided to commit to Jesse for life. I left my position in medical billing to become his constant caregiver.

Finances became difficult after the wedding

We married in October 2023. A stay in the intensive care unit after another severe episode prompted me to resign a few months later. Hospital staff trained me in essential care techniques. For the next two and a half years we managed on a reduced income and relied only on Jesse Medicaid benefits.

We moved to a smaller home and watched every expense including searching for the lowest-priced groceries. In January 2026 we discovered Colorado new Community First Services and Supports program which supports individuals who need long-term care while remaining at home.

We enrolled through Abby Care a platform that trains family members to become certified caregivers paid by Medicaid.

I now feel more capable in my role

Hourly pay ranges from 15 to 27 dollars depending on the level of care and certifications required. I completed training in first aid food safety and medication handling. One key skill involved using a gait belt to prevent falls.

As a paid personal care assistant I manage Jesse needs with greater confidence. The income has eased our financial pressure. Jesse has also begun a new medication that reduces his seizures and we are optimistic about the future ahead.